There's been a controversial article circulating ever since Time published this edition of their magazine:
|"The Childfree Life: When Having It All Means Not Having Children".|
Since I don't have a subscription to Time, I haven't read the entire article, but I have to admit that I'm intrigued by the choice to get married and never have children. I completely understand that there are many couples who are unable to have children for many, many reasons (infertility, financial constraints, etc), but I definitely grew up expecting to be a mother. I played house and took care of doll babies. When I got older, I thought about how long after marriage I would wait before giving birth (it ended up being 4 years).
Not too long ago, I remember reading a Facebook post from another Christian women's blog lamenting the negative attitude that some childless couples have towards children. The blame seemed to be placed solely on the childless couples for making a selfish choice, and that might very well be the case for some couples. (Some. I don't know everyone's reasons, so please don't get mad that I'm accusing any of you without children of being selfish.) But at the time, it struck me that we parents complain an awful lot about our kids and the "hardship" that we seem to think we're experiencing in parenthood.
Why in the world would anyone want to have children when all we do is talk about how hard parenthood is?
Initially, my idea for this post was to poll you all to see if you had ideas for why couples are choosing to not have children. I wanted to hear from childless couples about their reasons. But I have a different question for you:
How has having children been a blessing to your marriage? How have you grown?
There really isn't any getting around the fact that parenthood is hard. But today, I'd simply like us to encourage each other by sharing how become parents has helped you to become more Christlike and how your marriage has grown as a result of kids. I know that some of you may genuinely be struggling in your marriages because of the demands of family, but I think that if we all looked closely enough, we could see blessings. Maybe you learned something new about your husband. Maybe you learned how to depend on Christ. Maybe you and your husband became a closer team.
And if you are - by choice - a childfree husband or wife, I'd like to know if parents have turned you off from wanting to have a child. Sometimes we all need a little dose of truth so here's your chance to be honest with us.
As always, please remember to be kind. Chances are that you don't know the other commenters and you can't possibly understand their entire life philosophy or backgroud of experiences based on the brief synopses that are shared on the Internet.
Ok. Ready. Set. Share.