Lessons in Wifehood:The Just Judge

Please join me for a weekly study of 1 Peter 3:1-6 as we consider what these verses say about how to be a godly wife.

Likewise wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives. 1Peter 3:1

You can’t read 1 Peter chapter 3 without spending time in chapter 2, because the entire section on wives depends on the word "likewise” or “in the same way.” If I am going to gag over God's expectations of being a wife, I want a little more info before I bring on the sweaty pits. I need to know, “in the same way” as what or who?

Starting in chapter 2, verse 18, Peter is chatting about servants. It's a good move because servants are universal. We are all serving someone. A housewife serves her family. The career woman serves her boss. Even the President answers to the people. What does God want us to know about being a servant? He wants us to know that Jesus set the example when he "...committed no sin, neither was deceit found in his mouth. When he was reviled, he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting himself to him who judges justly (vs 22, 23).

These verses are the "likewise" of chapter 3! In the same way Jesus entrusted himself to "him who judges justly" (a.k.a. God the father), so wives are to be subject to their own husbands. --Now you can cringe. Have a fainting spell -  or a "case of the vapors" if you're deep south - and then get up and read on.

Jesus was subject to Herod, who was disappointed in Christ for not proving himself with a miracle. Jesus was subject to Pilate, who condemned Him to death. He was subject to the soldiers who beat him and made fun of him.* While all the circumstances around Jesus were chaotic and unfair, He was entrusting himself to the God the father, a good and perfect judge.

Jesus was innocent; are you sometimes? Do you feel misunderstood by your husband or judged unfairly? Jesus was too. Only he actually never sinned. I can't say the same for me. No matter how unfairly I have ever been treated, I can never say I have always been right. But Jesus was, and although he was right and true and harmless, he never took up arms or words to defend himself, but rather he trusted in a good sovereign Judge that wouldn't ever give him a stone or a snake if he asked for bread or fish.

We can't be subject to our husbands if we believe they are our just judge. We can't be subject to our husbands if we think they are capable of bearing the weight of our souls. No, we must be entrusting ourselves to God. When we really believe that God is working out in us the best life possible, when we believe that God doesn't plan evil for his children, then we can entrust ourselves to him. 

When we are entrusted to God, then we don't have to have the last word in every conversation. We don't have to make it crystal clear that we were right. We can be misunderstood, because we know that there is a God who understands us. We can be subject to our husbands when we don't worship them. If their approval means everything, then we will take issue with them constantly. After all, they are our perfect Judge and, therefore, we need them to not throw the book at us when we are guilty. Find us innocent. Be wise in every decision.

Oh, our poor husbands! Jesus knew all the people around him were incapable of the perfect justice he would require, so he didn't expect it from them. It wasn't up to Herod, Pilot, or the soldiers. It was up to the Just Judge of Heaven.

It's not for our husbands to sport the black robe and pound the gavel. Peter knows that the only way a woman can be subject to her husband is if she is entrusted to the God of the Universe the same way Jesus was. When God is so lovely you are entrusting yourself to his goodness although it is not evident in the entire world around you, then you can subject yourself to your husband because he's not the most important one to please anymore.

How does God ever become that lovely? Spend time considering the cross. When you were God’s enemy, Jesus died to give you life. When the cross of Christ is considered, our sacrifice is small in comparison. When we are taken up in amazement that God showed his love by his death, then we can trust our lives to him too. We can find God so lovely that we long to do what He asks, because He is worth the sacrifice. We can subject ourselves to our husbands out of love for Christ’s ultimate subjection on the cross.

* I am in no way referring to abusive behavior. Please seek help from the appropriate authorities if you are in an abusive relationship.

Sharing with:  Missional Women, Your Thriving Family, Consider the Lilies, Christian Mommy Blogger, NOBH, Homemaker By Choice, Live Called